I had a great thanksgiving with good friends. My family all live in Seattle and its hard to get back there due to the farm goings on and of coarse financial restraints, but I am fortunate to have a group of friends right here I can call my family. Years ago the premise of Indians and Pilgrims changed for me, so much of my time during this holiday is spent in compassion and sorrow over the near inhalation of the indigenous population. I wanted to write more about the sadness I feel but have not been able to craft words that can properly express my great inner grief. I try to focus on the present and what I can do as part of this human family to live more mindfully. This is a history of our nation that must be looked at with great care and honesty.
Its hard not to notice how much pain and suffering there is in the world, how much war and violence. At times it feels so overwhelming I just want to bury my head in the red dirt out back. But I know that's not the solution, its the problem. But its hard and I feel at times helpless. There is nothing I can do for the Palestinians, New Yorkers, or Oklahomans. So much suffering. All I can do is grow the vegetables. Take care of the animals, love the planet, listen, breathe, help where I can. I feel there is more that I could do and I am starting to try more diligently to find out what that is. But more and more avoidance isn't working for me.
Its time to be brave and look at the truth of suffering in the world. I may not be able to do anything about it but to acknowledge and be awake to it is more honorable I think, than to pretend its not happening. I have been bestowed with many blessings in my life and those blessing have awakened a spirit of gratitude I have never known. So much that when I wake up in the morning the first thought that comes to mind is; How can I serve? Today I'll be serving the animals and the vegetables. I may not be changing the world but I know I am part of being the change. That will have to be enough for now.