Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Re-thinking sexy

A day off the farm did me good today. I helped out at the Wellness Center for Wellness Wednesday a lecture series we offer (OSU). I and several other helpers (students) prepared 100 egg salad sandwiches (using the eggs from my hens) The subject of the lectures was successful healthy intimate relationships, getting a little spice in your love life...whatever! Egg salad probably wasn't the best choice, Some kind of meat may have been more fitting (rare tenderloin) and chocolate. Hell who needs a relationship when you have chocolate. Okay both is good, I'll admit. But were talking healthy and relationships in the same sentence.

Sometimes being a farm girl leaves me feeling well.... not so sexy. Some days I'm down right disgusting, especially during lambing and kidding season where I can be found most days with some form of goat or sheep embryonic fluid and poop on my clothes. I try as well as I can to stay clean but last year the sheep were going one right after the next. I pulled more lambs that year and was extra disgusting. But I figure Linda signed the disclaimer from the git go and more than had an idea of what she was in for.

This time of year my sexiness has to come from my sheer stamina in the Oklahoma heat, hoeing, weeding, watering and spraying fish emulsion  on struggling plants so not only do I come with dirt beyond imagination but seaweed and bat shit perfume! This is my life. But I try. Yesterday I bought a nice very bulky (I'm assuming so people with severe arthritis wont drop it) pink razor that looks nearly animated with its exaggerated curves. Linda asks "your thinking about shaving?" I mumble something back. Uncommitted. I think yea. Truth is I haven't shaved my legs in some time and It will probably take four hours, who has that time??? maybe I'll split it up into one hour segments so I will take me four days to get the job done. Then I just have to turn around and do it again. Maybe I'll just stick to pits and "such" (it is easier to get ticks off with out that pesky hair in the way). But anyway.....

So I may not be Catherine Deneuve or Isabella Rossillini kinda sexy, but I can whip up some sultry vittles (sounds like a good name for a restaurant in Depew). My idea of a sexy is tender local grass fed beef tenderloin seared and and topped with mountain Gorgonzola, roasted beets carrots and potatoes all homegrown of course with a nice salad, garlicky vinaigrette, smooth nutty chevre, fresh baked rustic bread, home made goat cream butter, A split of Veuve Clicquot brut, or a crispy Oregon sauve blanc. And then....a nice Silver oak Merritage or cab..... hot chocolate lava cake! oh god! I just got chills.
I'm a simple woman with simple needs. Until I really gave it some thought.
I'm complicated. Very, very complicated.


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