changes

I was in a funk all day yesterday between a feeling of sadness and confusion. I think the last three days and the dairy possibility were just a lot to take in. For the first time I saw real possibilities. But then I also saw real challenges too. Its hard to explain. I have no reason to feel bad and I wouldn't say I felt bad exactly. But if this dairy ends up working out my life is really going to change. Yea change. Change for the better? no one knows, I suppose that depends on how good the cheese is. There is uncertainty. That scares me.

So I rest in this; I am going forward on all of the research, but its secondary to whats currently going on at the farm. I'm finally in a place where things are working out. I'm excited for the possibilities of the upcoming season and feel more confident than ever this will be the best year yet. So I gotta take it slow. I got to be smart about it. There are so many opportunities being offered to me right now and its been hard not to want to grab everyone of them. But I promised myself to grow down. To strengthen my roots so I have something to stand and grow on. That's got to be my focus this year and the dairy is part of that, so I'll do the things I need to in order to make good sound decisions.

I have to say so far I feel much better today. After our CSA drop off Linda and I are working on the birthing jugs for the does that will start kidding soon. It will be a beautiful day, perfect for preparing for the cold front to come in next week.