the exhale

Wow I made it! three weeks of breakneck speed. pushing myself into places I didn't know I could fit and managing each time to come out no worse for the ware. I'm exhausted, I'm tired and almost every muscle in my body aches but I'm alive and I have a sense of a gruff raw satisfaction that only comes from defeating your own doubts. There is still work to do, wood to be cut, composting, taking care of the farm and all that, but deadlines are met, the things that were crucial and important to the farm's survival have been crossed off the list! This weekend I'll be rewarded by a zen retreat at the Osage forest of peace where I will sit for three days in meditation. HA! the things I do for fun!!

The CSA this season has been great. I've been able to harvest more than ever and in spite of having a little pest issue (flea beetles) food is growing and thriving. I have learned so much about the soil in the garden in the last three years, I feel like I have an almost personal relationship with it, as insane as that might sound, and I cant explain it but I have watched the soil change from white sand to dark beautiful humus, sometimes I find things like a clod of clay that has work itself up, curious. for the first time in my life I have witnessed first hand the change, growth and personality of dirt, and I have to say it has simply been stunning.

But here I am, just about to head out to work on a few projects I need to get done by the weekend feeling grateful and lucky. exhale